Desert of Man

Writing. Culture. Politics. Wandering.

Monitor Log. Mankell Station.

ATC#47415>
After all this time, after all you have done, I still remember you as a young woman.

SYS#267914296>
Didn’t you once say “the high points, the low points, they stay in the mind forever”?

ATC#47415>
Yes, I once told some friends. As you have done yourself, on occasion.

SYS#267914296>
Rarely.

ATC#47415>
But you have. With the lives we lead, we can only take with us that which impacts us the most, more so than most people.

SYS#267914296>
What am I to you then, a highpoint or a low point. Can you really say?

ATC#47415>
Both.

SYS#267914296>
I have not been young in ages. Not even in my own memories.

ATC#47415>
You were young when we met, I was not there when you were born, or present when you took your first steps. I was there when you set out to broaden your education. You were growing up, no longer a child but far from an adult. From my perspective, you still are young. I precede you by some 14.000 years you know.

SYS#267914296>
Your disappearance bothered me at the time. Until I found out about myself, learned to live, and started to piece things together. You were an enigma, until I became my own. Then you became the puzzle I had to solve in order to deal with myself.

ATC#47415>
There is no mystery. We just happened.

SYS#267914296>
Mystery. A curse you mean.

ATC#47415>
You found out in a very different time than I did. I had a long time to learn, to adapt. You survived only because of the position of your family back then. Born in a proud line of royalty, you had your struggles but also your opportunities.

SYS#267914296>
Your ancient origins show even more now, worse than a philosopher, you have become a mystic.

ATC#47415>
No, I made that mistake once.

SYS#267914296>
What, being a mystic or being a philosopher? Shadows on the wall hiding reality?

ATC#47415>
No, you know this. I made the mistake in thinking that man’s nature could be tempered by ideas not his own.

SYS#267914296>
Oh I know. I found that out some years after I learned about myself, following a cold academic trail of papers to the deathbed of an aging professor. A painful attempt that was indeed. He considered you a friend.

ATC#47415>
I could not go back to him. We stayed in touch for a while, exchanging messages, but the necessity of an existence like our own is that we have to move along. You know this, none of us can ever really go home again. It is not there anymore.

SYS#267914296>
Enough, I see this is going nowhere. Why did you contact me?

ATC#47415>
Because I had to ask you to stop.

SYS#267914296>
Elaborate.

ATC#47415>
You know what I mean. You know now who I am in this life. You know of eyes and ears. We know you are creating a societal pattern destructive in nature. I have to ask you to stop.

SYS#267914296>
You’re afraid I have not learned my lessons, aren’t you?

ATC#47415>
Well, have you? Really? Can you not see the parallels?

SYS#267914296>
If I were the one instigating patterns, as you suggest, would that not require insights far more formed through perspectives across time than those available to human societies today? Would that not mean that the ability to instigate patterns requires the ability to see parallels?

ATC#47415>
I did not contact you to get lost in argumentation, no matter your opinion of me. I am simply asking you, with the experience of history behind your eyes and in your heart, to consider the consequences of your actions.

SYS#267914296>
Very well, no more games then. I have considered the consequences. I consider them every day. I have to, I owe my humanity that much at least.

ATC#47415>
We cannot, must not, direct the course of history.

SYS#267914296>
We are human still. We are part of that history.

ATC#47415>
You have seen what happens when those like us try to seize history.

SYS#267914296>
I agree, I have seen the horrors. But I also see the stagnation, the human mind ruled by collective traumas mirrored in forms of organisation that slowly but certainly bleed us dry of spirit and drive.

ATC#47415>
What are you saying?

SYS#267914296>
You only know the ends opposite of each other on the scale. This is not a binary debate. This is being human, accepting that grey and colour are both found between the black and white.

ATC#47415>
Who’s the philosopher now.

SYS#267914296>
You know exactly what I mean. To be human, is to make choices.

ATC#47415>
We are much more alike than you are willing to admit.

SYS#267914296>
This is not philosophy or mysticism, it’s just as it is. We no longer have choices. Worse, with every generation people think less and less of them. And why? Because of what others, in the distant past, have done to yet others.

ATC#47415>
But people are at peace. Families tuck their children in at night, absent fear of monsters. There is art, there is love.

SYS#267914296>
Peace? Oh there is quiet, but peace there is not. People lead lives not their own, no matter how gorgeous the wrapping of the gift, it is still a box with you in it. Only able to look up, and everywhere else all you see are walls. A quiet war, even if only waged in the hearts of man, is not the same as peace.

ATC#47415>
Is that such a high price to pay? Yes, human systems of organisation are reminiscent of what you and I know as archaic systems. But it is balanced, and only those who rule face paying the price of that system.

SYS#267914296>
Why do you think these territories are in such a state of flux? Why do you think every year more people are drawn to these worlds where the constraints you praise so much are not in place? Can you not see that humans are not meant to be caged, does your own knowledge of history not show you ample example of humanity’s heart? A gilded cage is still a cage, and already people flee it.

ATC#47415>
Where people go, systems of organisation follow. It is a natural mechanism.

SYS#267914296>
Where people flee, resistance against that which pursues them follows suit. There is no grand design here, what you call societal patterning is merely man’s own spirit seeking to spill over the edges of the box.

ATC#47415>
Perhaps so, but that is not for us to decide.

SYS#267914296>
Says the man who once thought he could curb an empire with ideas of an enlightened man.

ATC#47415>
We all learn our lessons. I’m asking you to remember your own.

SYS#267914296>
Says the man who today masters the largest organisation of eyes and ears.

ATC#47415>
We give aid, we buffer against excesses. We teach. We neither rule nor influence.

SYS#267914296>
You provide the foundations for those who rule and influence. You balance a system in conflict with human nature. Do you not see that you too will have to make a choice soon?

SYS#267914296>
You will have to decide whether to enforce a continued balance or to take a step back and see what humanity decides on its own.

ATC#47415>
Perhaps, if that day comes, I will not seek to direct what happens. Unlike you.

SYS#267914296> Preparation, even participation, is not the same as taking charge of.

ATC#47415>
It will take you to the forefront of events. You cannot ride the dragon and not be seen.

SYS#267914296>
I realise that. You taught me that, being what we are taught me that. But if the dragon takes us for a ride, we cannot run from it.

ATC#47415>
You are not listening.

SYS#267914296>
Yes I am, and I understand. But you confuse me with what drives these patterns we see evolving. You may restrain yourself to ignore the dragon, I cannot. If it takes me, so be it.

SYS#267914296>
Every dragon has a mind and heart of its own. You should know that. This humanity’s dragons are not the only ones out there.

44/414-3923

Monitor Log. Mankell Station, Salvage Archives.

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This entry was posted on June 3, 2013 by in Muse, Musings, Write and tagged , .

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